# 006

it's weird how even the smallest change in something can make you feel so much better or so much worse. i changed the order of my apartment a bit yesterday(sorry to all my neighbours) and it made me feel instantly better. i slept better and woke up early today, without even an alarm. which is good because my sickleave ends on sunday(finally!). i also figured out how to get this apartment to look like something other than a place full of cardboard boxes(i have wayy too much stuff). don't really know yet what i'm going to do with a couple of things in here but i'll figure it out at some point.

my mom wants me to give her my stand-mirror and my atm-bookcase but she really didn't get that if i give her those, i have nowhere to but all the stuff in it to. i wouldn't mind switching, i'd have more room then to keep things in, but i doubt she'd go for that.

i miss my friend. i don't know what happened with us but i know that something did and we haven't talked in a while. over two weeks actually. i think she wrote about me in her blog. or maybe i'm just wishing so. i don't know. i wish i could get friend back. she was one of the people in this town that actually could be trusted, she didn't stab me in the back, to my knowledge anyway. but we just stopped talking. or she did. i don't even know. we didn't talk. i don't think she even knows how crappy i feel about it. have been feeling about it. it's strange.

also, i found out a week ago that the father of one of my long time friends died this summer. i feel really sad about it. they were close and she kinda shut off from the world. wish i could've been there for her. and i feel bad that i was mad at her about something insignificant when she was dealing with the grief. but then again, i didn't know. so maybe it's okay. because i'm not mad about it, now. i understand.

my leg is still kinda hurting from the fall, as is my hand with the cut. haven't been able to use my crutches for like a week because of the handpain, but i'm getting towards better. and my neck is kinda stiff from sleeping in the same position all night. also my left pointer hurts for some reason, must've slept weirdly on it at some point. who the hell sleeps on their finger thought? oh wait, that's me, the same girl who also has ninjadreams and punches walls.

well, that's about it folks! please join in next time as i talk about... well since these are really stuff that come to my mind when i write, i have no clue as to what is on next time.

to be continued...